Musings About Life... After Birth

So, I’ve been walking around 3 cm dilated and about 80% effaced for weeks now. At my appointment last Tuesday, my OB again tried to talk me into a March 6th induction. I’d still prefer to roll the dice and let it happen when it happens, so that’s what I’m doing. She seems to think this kid will come within a week or so, and judging by all of the little contractions I’ve been having, I have to agree with her. In fact, I doubt I’ll make it through the weekend.

My husband thinks it would be WAY cool if the baby came on Friday, February 29th, and many members of the Momtourage agree. Both Alison and Lee think said birthday would be a cool “conversation piece”. Personally, I think it would kinda suck, having your real “birthday” exist as the Olympics and Presidential elections do, only once every four years. Momtourage members Stephanie and my mom are more of this opinion.

Ultimately, though, I feel like birth dates aren’t that big of a deal. Sure, it would be nice to have one that allows everyone to celebrate with you, blah blah blah, but in the grand scheme of things, the date on which you’re born, at least in my opinion, is really an insignificant matter. I know it sounds cliché , but really, I just wish for a healthy baby and easy delivery - who cares about the date on which it happens?

A woman I used to be friends with lamented for quite some time after she got pregnant with #2 on her first try, disappointed that her immediate success meant that the kid would be due at the end of December. She found this ultra bummerific, citing that its birthday would always be overshadowed by the holidays and she would therefore have a tough time getting people to come to its birthday parties. And as if this wasn’t silly/annoying enough,  she chose to express all of this disappointment in front of me, her (at the time, at least) fertility-challenged friend, and another pal who had recently miscarried. “Nice priorities, not to mention nice friend” my best friend Jessica said when I told her about this. “Who the hell really cares that much about a birthday?” Apparently, she did.

The way I see it, if my kid is born healthy on 2/29, then Halle-freakin-lujah. I sure as hell hope the most unfortunate thing that ever happens to him is being born on a slightly odd date. Another boy who looks exactly like my husband, however…..that would really unnerve me.

Each morning, my son drinks milk and eats dry cereal and fruit for breakfast. He LOVES it. Every now and then, I try to give him eggs, yogurt, and other stuff, but he always wants the cereal. Fine. Pick your battles, right?

Normally, I give him a blend - Kashi Go Lean, Joe’s O’s from Trader Joe’s and some organic Raisin Bran called Peace Cereal (I know, I know, I am sorta obsessed with the organic - not to mention the Liberal- thing). Needless to say, he has a healthy digestive system.

Today, I received a press release about the toxicity of certain breakfast cereals. Naturally, I immediately freaked out.

The info in the release is taken from a book written by Christopher Ramsden, MD, the author of a new book, Nutrition by the Numbers ($18.95, theNQI.com), which introduces the NQI, a food rating system that provides a simple way to determine if a food will prevent or lead to the seven most common US diseases: heart disease, cancer, obesity, diabetes, Alzheimer’s, arthritis, and depression. Here it is:

Choosing a healthy cereal can be confusing. Labels such as “heart healthy,” “whole grain,” and “all natural” can be deceptive and really don’t tell much about the nutritional value of a cereal. One way to tell which cereals are the good guys and which are the villains is to use the Nutritional Quality Index (www.NQI.com), a new rating system that ranks the relative overall health value of individual foods. The NQI rating, ranging from -10 (toxic) to 0 (neutral) to +10 (exceptional), takes into account fifteen key dietary molecular components that scientists now know have a direct impact on the development or prevention of disease.

Based on scientific analysis of 233 American cereals, below is a list of 10 great and 10 harmful cereals.

These cereals contain plentiful amounts of ingredients that can play a significant role in preventing diseases.

NQI Ranking   Brand and Name
+10     Kellogg’s All-Bran Original
+10     Post 100% Bran
+9     Barbara’s Organic Grain Shop
+9     Kashi Go Lean
+8     Nature’s Path Flax Plus Flakes O-3
+7       Kashi Good Friends
+7     Weight Watchers Banana Almond Medley
+6     Back to Nature Heart Basics Flax and Fiber Crunch
+6       U.S. Mills Uncle Sam with Mixed Berries
+5     Weight Watchers Cinnamon Cluster Crunch

You should avoid feeding these cereals to your family, because they contain too many ingredients that have been shown to cause disease.

NQI Ranking   Brand and Name
-4     U.S. Mills Erewhon Crispy Brown Rice Original
-4       Barbara’s Bakery Organic Wild Puffs Cocoa
-4       Kashi Organic Promise Strawberry Fields
-4     General Mills Lucky Charms
-5     General Mills Rice Chex
-6     Kellogg’s Rice Krispies
-7     Post Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds
-9     Kellogg’s Cocoa Krispies
-9     Kellogg’s Froot Loops
-10     Cap’n Crunch Crunchberries

Not so much of a shock that Froot Loops, Cocoa Krispies and Cap’n Crunch are on the list - isn’t everything that tastes that good total crap for your bod? The Kashi on the “bad” list, though….that shocked me. Thank God my son’s Kashi Go Lean is still OK.

Beware of what you put in your (or your kid’s) bowl…..

Yesterday, Momtourage member Lauren ran into a woman who was in the new moms group we joined shortly after our first babies were born. “Oh Chelsea, she looked like such a….mom,” Lauren reported, shuddering. Though I probably should have been filled with indignation to hear “mom” used to signify “dowdy/schlumpy”, I wasn’t; I knew exactly what Lauren meant, because, admittedly, I’m guilty of using “mom” pejoratively too.

Sadly, these days “mom” (think “mom jeans”) is all too often used to mean “dumpy”. Blame it on SNL’s “mom jeans” faux ad (tagline: “Because you’re not a woman - you’re a mom!”) - or the reality that when you’re pushing a stroller, doing so in sweats and Pumas as opposed to a Michael Kors shift and Prada pumps is, let’s face it, a heck of a lot easier.

I remember watching - and loving - contestant Laura Bennett on Project Runway a couple of seasons ago. She was the redheaded mother of like, 500 (ok, 6, but that’s essentially 500) kids, yet she always looked impeccably put-together. Essentially, she was the anti-”mom”. “If I am dressed dumpy, I am going to eat badly and act dumpy,” she said. “It’s such a simple thing to get dressed and feel better about yourself.” Perhaps “mom” style really is that simple; it takes a little extra effort, but getting “dressed” when you’re a mom is about more than just fashion - it’s a state of mind and being.

This Spring, updating your wardrobe from “mom” to “MOM!” is super simple. Trust me - you don’t need an innate, Carrie Bradshaw-esque sense of style and you won’t have to sacrifice comfort or a ton of cash. Simply take some of what you’ve already got, add a few on-trend items and be ruthless in getting rid of your dated, “mom” duds. Let these tips, taken from the Spring 2008 runway trend report I wrote for the April issue of The Family Groove, be your guide for what to add to, toss from and keep in your closet this season in order to render yourself decidedly un-dowdy:

Bright colors

Items in bold colors were all the rage last fall, and continue to be just as omnipresent this spring. Maintain the trend in warmer weather by wearing floaty tops, tank-style dresses or swingy skirts in bright hues. If you want to try the bright color trend, but are a little hesitant to abandon your tried-and-true neutrals, test the waters by toting a bright bag or slipping on a hot-hued pair of sandals. A great accessory to try: the Los Feliz Beverly Tote from L.A.M.B, which is $395 at shopbop.com or at the Tyson’s Corner Center Nordstrom.

If you’re ready to jump right in and take the plunge, add a piece in a neon shade. In order to avoid a full-on 80s vibe, pair neons and bright pieces (like this Alexander Wang Pebbled Knit Tank, $207, at www.shopbop.com or Georgetown’s Cusp) with subtle neutrals like khaki, gray or navy, and accessorize with simple gold or silver jewelry, as seen below:

Embellished pieces

Last fall, tops, dresses and accessories adorned with jewels ruled the runways – and retail racks. This trend is still going strong for spring, though in a slightly more subtle manner. Your best bet: tops and dresses with necklines decorated with delicate jewels, metallic studs or graphic, metallic sequins. My (ultra-affordable) picks: Studded Knit Dress, $32.80, and Sequined Knit Tunic, $24.80, both available at forever21.com or the Montgomery Mall location of Forever 21.

Gladiator Sandals

This Greek-inspired footwear was popular last spring, and will continue to show up in stores and on soles this year as well. For comfort, wear a flat style during the day, but for evening, kick your nighttime look up a notch with a high-heeled or wedge version. For the most flattering, leg-lengthening look, choose a pair with a thin ankle-strap. My picks: Nine West’s Sulliban Sandal, $89, and Jobilyn Sandal, $79, both available at ninewest.com or at the White Flint Mall location of Nine West.

A neutral bag

Last season, snow white bags were seen on the arms nearly celeb lunching at The Ivy. This season, however, neutral bags in bone, gray and beige are the white-hot way to finish your outfit. My picks: the Kooba Lola Tote, $645, and Marc by Marc Jacobs Turnlock Teri Tote, $428, all available at Bloomingdales.com or the Chevy Chase Bloomingdale’s.

Light denim

Dark denim is still chic (and, of course, slimming), but this season, try trading in your trusty indigo jeans for paler-hued versions. Avoid going super-light and instead opt for a cool chambray shade. Wider-leg styles are in, as are boot-cut and skinny-leg varieties, so choose the style you find most flattering for your body type. My pick: J Brand Love Story Jeans in Summer, $179, jbrandjeans.com or Bethesda’s Denim Bar.

Ethnic prints

Ikat, batik and tie-dye, looks most commonly associated with the 70s love child look, are suddenly fresh and fun. Ease them into your wardrobe without looking like a Deadhead by pairing a top with tailored, trouser-style jeans. My picks: Nieves Lavi V-Neck Poncho, $132 and Yaya Aflalo Solar Tunic, $294, both available at shopbop.com and Gerogetown’s Urban Chic.

Mod-inspired fashions

The 60s pop art look has come and gone, so shelve your graphic prints for now and instead opt for an ethnic print or an acid-hued bright.

Bermuda-length shorts

Time to (ugh) hit that Stairmaster, because shorts hemlines are rising faster than Google stock. Knee-length Bermuda shorts are out, and have been replaced by mid-thigh and shorter varieties.

Corset belts

Shelve your thick & chunky corset belts for now and instead cinch your favorite dress or tunic with a skinny belt, preferably in a bright shade of patent leather.

Does your home need some sprucing up for spring? If so, you have to catch me on XM Radio’s “Broadminded” Thursday afternoon at 12:20 PM EST (and replayed at 6:20 PM EST) on XM Channel 155. I’ll be joining Broads Molly and Christine to share my favorite home goods websites and stores, give some great suggestions with how to simply – and inexpensively - make your home over to include this spring’s hottest decorating trends, and give them the goods on my most recent home make over projects: transitioning my son’s room from nursery to big boy room and setting up the new baby’s nursery.

Here are some of my favorite stores and websites for great home design products:

For all-around decorating ideas: Pottery Barn Sure, Pottery Barn may be a bit ubiquitous, but for the quality, value and selection, you just can’t beat it. This spring, Pottery Barn is completely on-trend, offering loads of items in eye-popping, bright (yet completely livable) color. Including everything from furniture to bedding in vibrant hues of greens, yellows, blues and pinks, you’re sure to find something cool and reasonably-priced to inject a spring-y dose of fun into your home this season. Want to slowly ease into the color trend? Try adding a bright lamp like the Stella Bedside Lamp to your room ($229).

Feeling bolder? Why not switch your bedding for the hothouse floral Nora Duvet Cover and Shams ($29-99) or add a bright chair like the Emery Wingback ($799) to an otherwise neutral room.

If you’re ready to dive in head-first, consider repainting with a bright color. Whether you’re into redoing a bathroom or an even larger room, Pottery Barn offers a wide selection of signature colors – all of which go with their furniture, of course - that they created in conjunction with Benjamin Moore. You can check them out in stores, in the catalog and online at potterybarn.com.

For great modern furniture: West Elm If traditional not your thing, but you’re also not into the ultra-stark contempo-look, chances are West Elm has exactly what you’re looking for. Check out their retail stores, catalog and web site for great clean-lined, modern-inspired furniture, accessories and bedding. It’s incredibly reasonably priced, not to mention excellently made. Some of <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 />my favorite pieces include the Scoop-Back Chairs ($99 each) and Slipper Chair ($499).

For more information on their merchandise, visit their stores, leaf through their catalog and visit westelm.com.

For great accessories and upholstery: Ballard Designs If you love the traditional yet eclectic look, you must check out Atlanta- based Ballard Designs. The catalog and website (no retail stores yet) offer a ton of great furniture and accessories (I especially love these whimsical terracotta pears, $42.95). Their best value may be their super-cheap yet incredibly gorgeous upholstered pieces - simply pick out what you’d like to order (a sofa, chair, chaise lounge, etc.) and choose one of their designer fabrics, and they’ll make it for you in no time flat. Visit their site at ballarddesigns.com.

For great seating: Clubfurniture If you love what you see in all the pricey catalogs but just can’t spend that kind of money quite yet, check out clubfurniture.com. With styles nearly identical to the mass-market retailers (probably because they all come from the same North Carolina manufacturer), you’ll be able to score a sofa for a fraction of what the mall stores will charge you. I especially like their custom sectional offerings - the Brooke collection is a dead-ringer for a sectional offered at Crate & Barrel. Visit clubfurniture.com for more information.

For great kids furniture: Pottery Barn Kids Unfortunately, there aren’t a ton of websites that offer a wide range of classic, well-made kids’ and nursery furniture that doesn’t scream “juvenile”. When it comes to quality and value, Pottery Barn is my go-to source to outfit kids’ rooms. Their children’s outpost, Pottery Barn Kids, which offers products in retail stores, online and also through their catalog, offers pint-sized versions of classic favorites, all of which are cool enough for your kid enjoy for years and grow into gracefully. For her son’s new big-boy room, I chose items from PBK’s Rustic Thomas collection and sports-y bedding from the Junior Varsity collection.

One of the coolest things PBK has begun recently offering: free grid templates and proportionately-exact stickers of all of their furniture pieces and rugs. With them, you can lay out your room in a number of ways, making sure everything you choose will fits in your kids’ room, play space or nursery.

For great nursery decorating: Serena and Lily There are countless nursery linen options out there, but if you want to create a truly sophisticated yet sweet nursery, I say you must check out Serena and Lily (in fact, I chose bedding, paint and a rug from its “Zeke” collection to decorate the new baby’s room).

Founded by Serena Dugan, a textile designer and artist, and Lily Kanter, a baby boutique owner, the line features sumptuous crib and big-kid linens, as well as coordinating furniture, rugs, accessories ad low-PVC paints. Want a free catalog of their products? Click here!

In their new book, “Serena and Lily’s Nursery Style”, Serena and Lily offer tips on how to find your personal style and create your dream nursery.

Visit serenaandlily.com or firefliesandfairytales.com to check out Serena and Lily’s offerings. Want to win a copy of their new book? Enter to win by emailing me at chelsea@themomtourage.com, and sending me your name and address.

The Sports Illustrated soft porn

swimsuit issue came in the mail today. The magazine annoys me for a multitude of reasons: first, I don’t know why they even bother to claim that there are swimsuits in that issue; the majority of the women are essentially buck naked, and those (at least in this issue) who are “clothed” are wearing painted-on “swimsuits”. Second, all the women are ridiculously skinny and hot, and at 8 months pregnant and about 35 pounds over my ideal weight, I freaking hate women like that (oh, who am I kidding - I always hate women like that). At times I’m on the fence about how I feel about Hillary Clinton as leader of the free world, but when I saw the magazine, I thanked God that there’s a woman running for President to counteract some of the SI-generated “women are nothing but eye candy/sex objects” crap.

Perhaps just to mess with me a bit, my husband brought the magazine into the kitchen while I was giving our son dinner. “Look what came today!” he sang, waving the magazine in front of our son’s face. I rolled my eyes.

Our son grabbed the magazine and looked at the cover, checking out glamazon cover girl Marisa Miller, who was clad in a bikini bottom smaller than one of his diapers, her chest covered with a few strands of beads. You know, exactly the kind of thing women wear all the time when they go to the beach.

It’s Mommy!” he said, pointing at Marisa.

When he asked for a cookie after dinner, I gave him five.

Aside from Momtourage member’s Alison’s golden retriever, Dylan, I’ve never been a huge fan of dogs. I grew up with cats, so I’m partial to them. Dogs are just so….high maintenance. Most jump all over you, hump your leg, sniff you, bark a lot…ugh. Generally, I just don’t like ‘em, much to dog lovers’ disbelief.

Dylan, however, is chill, which is probably why I like him. My husband wants to get a dog at some point, rationalizing that “Every boy needs a dog.” If I could be guaranteed a Dylan, I’d get a dog, but like kids, you just can’t guarantee that the dog’s personality will be everything you’ve hoped for.

I am currently 35 weeks pregnant, due with baby #2 in about 4 weeks (March 15, to be exact). Today, I had my first weekly OB appointment - the ones where they begin checking your cervix to see if you’re “close”.

Apparently, I am: today’s exam revealed I’m 3 centimeters dilated and 50% effaced (for those of you without a bevy of obstetrics knowledge, that’s code for “close”). When I went to the hospital in labor with my first, I was only 2.5 cm. I think my exact response after hearing the news was “You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Good thing Dr. Loveland, my OB, has a sense of humor.

“What does this mean?” I asked, my mind racing through the list of 4,000 things I still need to accomplish in the 4 weeks before the baby is scheduled to arrive.

“Really, it’s pretty typical for a second pregnancy,” Dr. Loveland replied. “You could walk around like this for weeks, so ultimately, it doesn’t tell us much in terms of when you’ll deliver. If you do want an induction, however, it would be a smooth and quick one considering you’re already a third of the way there.” A member of a 10-doctor practice, she’s been pushing for me to have an induction on March 6th, a day she is on call, because she wants to deliver the baby. I’m not sure I want to mess with nature that way, but if this kid continues to jam his heel into my right-hand ribcage, we may have a date on the 6th after all.

On the way home from the doctor, I left “holy crap” messages with a few members of The Momtourage. Alison called me back twice until she got me. “What does this mean? I need to know what they said!” she pleaded. I recounted to her everything the doctor said.

“Woah,” she replied.

Freaked out, I changed the subject to making plans for tomorrow when we drop our kids off at school. They are in the same preschool class, so we go usually go grab coffee while we wait for them to be done. After we firmed things up she said, “See you tomorrow…..hopefully!”

Yikes.

Catch me at 7:30 PM EST tonight on WBAL Baltimore’s “Sportsline with Steve Davis: Show. To listen in, go here and then click on the “listen live” button on the top left-hand corner of the page.

I’ll be discussing last-minute Valentine’s Day Gifts for guys who’ve waited until the 11th hour to buy something for their Valentines (come on guys….you know who you are). My tip: think outside the (chocolate-filled) box with these new twists on old favorites:

Chocolates: Instead of giving your sweetie a heart-shaped Whitman’s Sampler box (because eww…those aren’t even good), why not consider signing him or her up for Zingerman’s, an unreal good bakery/gourmet food emporium in Ann Arbor, MI, brownie-of-the-month club? Varieties include the insanely addictive magic brownies, orange almond brownies, pecan blondies and genuinely ginger brownies, just to name a few. Prices start at $84 for a 3-month subscription, and vary depending on the subscription length and/or number of brownies you desire. Visit Zingermans.com to order.

Flowers: Sending a dozen red roses is so cliche - not to mention expensive. Why not think outside the (green, tissue paper-lined) box and instead send a bouquet of red tulips? For a mere $40, you can get 20 stems from marthastewartflowers.com. She’ll love your originality. And because they’re from Martha, you know they’re gonna be beautiful…

A love note: Want to express your love in an unconventional way? For an irreverent take on the traditional love note, simply pen your thoughts and then send them to sendamessage.nl and pay 30 Euros (roughly $44), and they’ll spray paint your message on the West-Bank Barrier in Palestine. You and your recipient each get three digital photos of your message emailed to you. Not so into graffiti? Why not get her a personalized set of note cards from my new favorite stationery designer, Erin Condren ($38 for a set of 20 personalized notes, envelopes and address labels, erincondren.com).

....and because we’re talking to sports fans:

If your Valentine loves sports, why not get her (or him - ladies, we know we sometimes wait until the last minute sometimes too!) her own little piece of sports history? Uncommongoods.com offers cuff links and pendants fashioned out of stadium seats salvaged from famous ballparks like Baltimore Memorial/Busch Stadium, Yankee Stadium, Fenway Park, RFK Stadium, etc. $150-230, uncommongoods.com.

With these ideas, you really have no excuse to forgo gift giving this Valentine’s Day…

I am obsessed with stationery. I love cute little note cards, envelopes and address labels - especially if they are personalized. In this age of email, googlechat and Facebook (Momtourage members Jen and Hallie suckered me into setting up my own page, even though I’m still convinced it’s mainly for high schoolers and college kids), isn’t it nice to receive a handwritten note in the good old fashioned mail?

I recently came across the ultra cool stationery and cards from Erin Condren. It’s graphic and modern, yet still classically sweet and traditional. This Valentine’s Day I sent out personalized Valentine’s Cards from her Valentine’s Day line (she has all sorts of other seasonal card offerings too). I don’t want to spoil it for those who will be receiving them, so I won’t reveal which ones I chose, but here are a few of her V-day styles, all of which come with coordinating address labels:

This summer, Restoration Hardware will be coming out with their own collection of baby and kids furniture, Restoration Hardware Baby & Child. I bet it’s gonna be just as beautiful as their current offerings (and, likely, just as expensive). Can’t wait to see it!

To receive information about the collection, click here.